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The Book of Levy Tevy Kus

Chopter 1

1) Now after Mudka was Dead, the spirit of Mota came upon All Those That were Left and saw that the people of Mudka were still in the wilderness.

2) And the Roscoites, as these people were known, where extremely greedy for land as they did not have any, and this make one feel sorta left out.

3) And they cried out unto Mota saying. " Oh, Mota, We needeth some Land, for it is a commodity of Great Wealth, and whoever heard that wandering around in the Wilderness was Cool anyway, in fact it's Nowheresville."

4) Now Mota was in-fact looking out for the Roscoites, and sent a Plague of Turtles and Hamsters on the people who had Land, and they left, feeling sorta Put Out.

5) Now the Roscoites were exceedingly Righteous, since all the agnostics amoung them had been eliminated, and they wore the required 37 Purple Ropes.

6) And the Roscoites followed all the laws as set down by Mota, Roscoe, and Poopy Panda, all the Prophets, etc., etc.

Chopter 2

1) And Poopy Panda spake unto the Masses of the Roscoites and spoke the Laws of Eating, and they are:

2) Under no circumstances are Ye allowed to eat Hamsters! Now as It is known, Hamsters are made in the Image of the Lord Roscoe and therefore they constitue a Sacred type of Hoogly Animal. And anybody that eats a Hamster is Crazy anyway because they couldn't get more than one mouthfull out of one.

3) Nor are Ye allowed to eat Turtles! For Turtles are made in the Image of Peddiddle, and therefore they are Hoogly and blessed for Peddiddle is the most important and the best prophet. (These words are written at the commandment of Poppy Panda by Peddiddle).

4) And the Voice of the Lord Roscoe was Heard on High and He spake saying,"

The following foods are unclean and should not be eaten:

5) And These words are to be written down so it doth not take the Mind of any sort of Lawyer or Ba-Foof-Nick to interpret the Plain Sense of them.

6) The following may be eaten with the greatest care. These are:

  • Pubby Kibbles - for every body knows that these be Hamster Food, and
  • should only be given unto Hamsters for They are Hoogly;

    7) And eat not these:

    8) And the following things should be Eaten:

    9) But not these:

    All manner of crawling things - Insects, Spiders, and Gumpshes; DDT and Clordane and Deldrin - if you know what's good for you!

    10) An this is the word of Mota, Roscoe and Poopy Panda; Written down so all can See. And therefore it is verily Hoogly.

    11) And Poopy Panda spake saying, " Do all of these commandsments and be Hoogly unto your Gods and follow all the Prophets and the Men of discernment and the Women who tell these men of discernment what to do."

    12) And the People of Mudka said, " We will all that ye wishest us to do notwithstanding, trounceth not on our blue suede shoes."

    Chopter 3

    1) And the Hoogly Fax of Poopy Panda came upon Mudka and it said,"Speak unto the People and say these things:

    2)And Mudka did as Poopy Pand instructed in the Hoogly Fax from on High.
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