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The Fables of the Old Man and his Hamster

The Fifth Bunch of Fables.

XV. The Fable of the Hardend Steel Rod
or
the Fable of the Hardened Steatite Furshluginer

All along the mudbanks of the Wash-Ka-Happy River in the Month of May did live a small band of Purple People Eaters. When they were in doubt about what to eat, they would eat any purple person that would come allong and they would feel justified and safe. Now, as everybody knows the purple people take their vacations in the Month of May, for it is a Merry Time of the Year. So the Purple People Eaters were getting very hungry. At this juncture they decided to change their diet to Steatite Fushluginners which were very plentiful in the land.

It is also well known to everybody except for the Purple People Eaters that the Purple People take their Steatite Fushluginners with them when they take their vacation. But there was was one Steatite Fushluginner that was not with the Purple People. It was: a Hardened Steatite Fushluginner! And, it was NOT in the MOOD to be Eaten! The Purple People Eaters did not knot this, however, and one Purple People Eater tried to eat the Hardened Steatite Fushluginner. He was promtly Discombobulated! Then another Purple People Eater tried and he was promptly Discombobulated. Then the third Purple People Eater tried and he was promptly Discombobulated. Then the fourth, and the fifth and so on and so forth until there were no more Purple People Eaters anymore.
They had all been Discombobulated!

Now this here Mota had been witnessing this happening and said, "Verily, I will make my Temple to be built here on the Mudbanks of the Wash-Ka-Happy River. For what has has happen therunto in this Place has Verily been Hoogly!" And It Was Done!

Moral - Won't the Purple People be surprized when they come Home!

XVI. The Fable of the aromatic Poopsy

( a Fable of True Belief )

In the Land of Gresham and Goshawk, lived an Old Man and His Hamster. And they were exceeding uprightious and Did All that which was Commanded in the Books of Mota, Mishigas, Mishugina, Peddidle, and Poopy Panda, as well as all the other Hoogly and Uprightious Writings an Hoogly Books. Now in that land were Evil People who were unbelievers in the True Truth of the Lord Roscoe. And they would rampage through the land, arresting people and sending them to the Blech Factories, where they had to work many Yuchy days of Manual Labor, turing out Blech. Now the Old Man had just been praying for the deliverence of the world into the state of enrapture with ASHLOZMO. The Evil People didst swoop down upon them and didst cary them away.....

Moral - I bet you wouldn't lake that to happen to you! Find out what happens next in the next fable ( to be continued)

XVII. A continued Fable of the Aromatic Poopsy.

Now the Old Man and His Hamster were sore afraid that the Evil People, who were called Gretskies, would do them Harm and prayed mightily to Mota and Poopy Panda. Then the Hamster got a very bright idea, BOING!. He mad a Poopsy. Then the Old Man didst flung the Poopsy (since it was fresh--it was aromatic) at the Gretskies and they were turned into coprolites of merde de toros. Now the Old Man got out of the cart that the Gretskies had place him and put the Gretskies in his place. The Old Man and His Hamster guided the Cart through the streets of theCapital City Crying, "Throw off the Yolk of the Hated Gretskies." They were heard by the people who then cried out, " But the Gretskies are strong and will throw us into the Blech Factory!" Now from accross the town came the rumble of tanks. It was the Gretskies! (what will happen next to the Old Man and His Hamster? Tune in on the next fable !!!!!!)

XVIII. An even still continued Fable of the Aromatic Poopsy.

Now the Old Man and his hamster were sore afraid that the tanks of the Gretshies would run over them and all the people assembled in the town square and in the town circle and in the town triangle and prayed mightily unto Mota, Elucelom, and Poopy Panda for deliverence. Ans the Hamster produced another very aromatic Poopsy of his never ending supply of aromatic Poopsies. And the Old Man picke up the Poopsy and flung it at the approching tanks of the Gretskies and turned them into well fertilized flower pots. And the Gretskies in the tanks were turned into Moose Manure. Now the people of the town said, " with such Aromatic Poopsies, we shal overcome the Evil Gretskies." And they marched off to the Blech Factories where so many of their friends and relatives were being held in the Yuchy Blech production lines. But then the airplanes of the Gretskies flew over them and started to drop bombs on the people. (then what will happen? Tune in on the next thuroughly exciting Fable where we will come to the conclusion of our story)

XIX. And Yet a more continued Fable of the Aromatic Poopsy.

Now the the Old Man and His Hamster (Who was the Blessed Homas do Torquemada) Prayed mightily unto the Great God Mota and to the Lord Roscoe. And the Hamster produced still another one of his aromatic Poopsies. And the Old Man took the Poopsie and placed it in his very powerfull sling shot and shat down the Evil Airplanes of the Evil Gretskies and turned them into Bat Guanno. Now the Populace rushed off and destroyed the Blech Factory where many people had spent many day of Yuchy Labor, making Blech. And the Old Man and His Hamster returned to their simple abode and thanked Mota, Elucelom, Poopy Panda and the Lord Roscoe the many miracles that had benn done that very day and that they had recently witnessed. And the Hamster made another aromatic Poopsy.

Moral -- Poopy Panda saithis in his lovable growly voice, "Buy Ye the Essence of Mota in our Indulgences and pray mightily unto Mota and Me for deliverence"

XX. The Fable of the Green Glop and the Puple Veebles

Once upon a time in the land of the Green Glop and the Bad Hanksterst, there lived an Old Man and his Hamster. They were ecxeedingly rightious and worshipped the Great God Mota 37 times a day. At that time there were those who went from house to house and priech the false doctrine of the false witnesses of a god called Jehovah. These fase witnesses confronted the Old Man and he said,"I go Pogo".

XI. The Fable of the Green Glop and the Old Man and his Hamster.

Once upon a time there was an Old Man and his Hamster who were not ver uprightious and didn't worship the great got mota 37 times a day. Of these 37 times a day that the Old Man and his Hamster did not pray, the 27 of which they didn't even notice that they were not Praying. We all know the consequences of not Preying to the Great Go Mota. They are: Long Life; Health; Happiness; and length of days (more than 24 hours). So the Old Man and his Hamster, suffered from these sufferings and were happy ever after.

So the Old man and his Hamster went to the other end of the barfarooty and saw what was going on there. In this section of the barfarooty there were many many people who were the ipitomy of g grat god brafs in their pants, Such as that there were in the thick of things and were also over the top of the hill there were also the great gumphs in the bottom of the hill. So the old Man and his Hamster seeing these things at the top of the hill and also at the bottom of the hill decided to get out of there quick and write a best cellar about the going on at that place.

After that the Old Mand and his Hamster got a large economy sized "D" and they retired from the scene.

Still there were those strange goings on at the top and the bottom of the hill in that place although such things could not be proved. Still the rains came, however, and the evidence was washed down into the Mud Banks of the Wash Ka Happy River and unto the Banks thereof and to the edges of the banks thereof. And they cried,"Oh Watana Se ouare", and at that they fell on their noodle and pervished.

Then the Old Man and his Hamster were well rid of the Evil of the Bad people of the people or people who lived at the top and the bottom of the hill and expropriated their property. Then the puple people eaters cam down from the wash that was flowwing down from the washing machine and ate all the puple people and since there were no purple people they starved to death. Then the Old Manand his Hamster became jowful and they were in the best of spirits and they had plenty of money (which explains this) and they went down into the depths of the VeeBlocks that were standing in the way and there they stayed for 1 million years.

Moral: No Happiness is Short.

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