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The story of Bif and his Hoogly Descrambler

The Mute Testimony in an Oral Way of Bif

Bif is the Lower Slobovian name of the Son of pioneer Mota Pesters,
Bart and Betty Bamboozle.
Bif's Design

He has served The Lord Roscoe and the Little Lord Joozis since age sixteen. He was filled with the Hoogly Bubemiesah at age seventeen, called to the minstry at age eighteen, and Made his first Descrambler at nineteen.

Bif Bamboozler was thinking about all the HBO that he had missed out on when an e-mail frum Poopy Panda came into his Poopy Panda Stuffed Toy. Poopy Panda becan to say the contents of the e-mail and it became Hoogly scripture. An d here it is!

The Book of Descramblers
Chapter 1


Now the Word of Poopy Panda cam upon Bif as he was working in his Laboratory.
And Poopy Panda said," Get these REQUIRED MATERIALS."
1 - Radio Shack mini-box ( #270-235)
1 - 1/4 watt resistor, 2.2k-2.4k ohm (RS #271-1325)
1 - 75pf-100pf variable capacitor (Very hard to find)
2 - F61a chassis-type coaxial connectors (RS #278-212)
12" - No. 12 solid copper wire
12" - RG59 coaxial cable
And These are the INSTRUCTIONS
Bare a length of No. 12 gauge solid copper wire and twist around a 3/8" nail or rod to form a coil of 9 turns. 1:6
Elongate coil to a length of 1 1/2" inches and form right angle bends on each end.
Solder the varible capacitor to the coil. 1:8
It doesn't matter where you solder it, it still does the same job. 1:9
The best place for it is in the center with the adjustment screw facing upward
Note: When it comes time to place coil in box, the coil must be insulated from grounding.
This can be done by crazy-glueing a piece of rubber to the bottom of the box, and securing the coil to it.
Tap coil at points 2 1/2 turns from ends of coil and solder to coaxial chassis connectors 1:13
And bring tap leads through holes in chassis box.
Use as little wire as possible.
Solder resistor to center of coil
and ground other end of resistor to chassis box, using solder lug and small screw.
Drill a 1/2" diameter hold in mini-box cover to permit adjustment of the variable capacitor from the outside.
Inspect the device for defects in workmanship and place cover on mini-box.
Tighten securely
Place device in line with existing cable on either side of the coverter box
and connect to television set with the short piece of RG59 coaxial cable. Set television set to HBO channel.
Using a plastic screwdriver (non-metallic), adjust the varible capacitor until picture tunes in.
Sit back, relax, and enjoy!!!!
Have fun...

You may schedule Big for technical assitance by calling him at 1-757-420-0389 or by e-mail: Bif@hotmail.com_balulah.

All Rosconian Scriptures are quoted from the New Hymie Version.
All New Testament Stuff is quoted from The Massage by Gene Metersen.

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©1996 Jeez fer Joozis
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